Classification Notice for Mystery Drawer
One drawer in this home has been designated, through a process nobody initiated, as the location for objects that do not belong in any other drawer.
CLASSIFICATION NOTICE RE: The drawer in the kitchen, second from the left EFFECTIVE: Retroactively, from approximately six months after moving in
This drawer is hereby formally classified as a General Provisional Items Repository, a category previously designated informally as "that drawer" and colloquially as the useful drawer, the everything drawer, or, in external communications, "the drawer, you know which one."
Contents as of Issuance
Two batteries of unknown charge. One key, purpose unconfirmed. One charging cable for a device that may no longer be in use. Seven rubber bands. One restaurant menu (venue closed). Three receipts from this year. Two receipts from last year. One padlock without a key. One key without a padlock.
One pen that functions. Two pens that do not. One object whose purpose is not immediately clear but which falls into the category of things that seem like they should not be thrown away.
Acquisition Record
The batteries arrived from a remote control whose battery compartment was replaced with new batteries. They were placed in the drawer in case they still had some charge. They have been in the drawer for fourteen months.
The key was found during a move and has been retained on the grounds that throwing away an unidentified key is the kind of decision that proves consequential immediately after being made.
The menu was kept because the restaurant was good. The restaurant is now a clothing store.
Governing Principle
The drawer exists because certain objects have a legitimate claim to existence in the home but no specific location assigned to them. These objects cannot be thrown away because they might be needed. They cannot be put anywhere else because all other places have specific purposes that these objects do not satisfy.
The drawer provides a location for the objects without requiring a decision about them. The objects wait. The drawer holds them. No one asks questions.
Duration
The classification is indefinite. A reclassification would require sorting the drawer and making decisions about each item. This has not happened. It will not happen during the current occupancy. The drawer will be reconsidered during the next move.