Classification of Photo Selection Diplomacy as Normal Conduct
The group photo has been approved, subject to everyone looking acceptable in it.
What Would Have Happened If Everyone Had Simply Chosen the First Acceptable Photo
The photo would have been chosen. It would have been acceptable to the person who took it and distributed it. It would have been acceptable to most of the people in it. One person would have privately felt their eyes looked odd but said nothing, because the statement "my eyes look odd in this photo" has no clear resolution protocol and would require everyone to look at the photo again.
Instead, that person said nothing. The photo was kept.
Total elapsed time: four seconds.
What Actually Happened
The person choosing the group photo opened the camera roll. There were eleven photos from the evening. In the first photo, two people were laughing and one person's eyes were closed. In the second photo, all eyes were open but the lighting was described, internally, as "not great." In the third photo, the lighting was acceptable but one person at the edge appeared to be mid-sentence.
A fourth photo was examined. It was technically sound. However, the person choosing the photo noticed that they themselves did not look their best in it, and found it difficult to select a photo in which they did not look their best while ostensibly choosing for everyone.
This is not vanity. This is governance.
The Protocol
Any photo selection diplomacy involving two or more people must preserve the appearance that neither person is keeping score. No one may say "I look bad in this one." No one may say "you look fine, I'll use this one." The selection must appear to be made on neutral grounds: lighting, focus, composition, the general energy of the image.
A minor preference is left politely unstated.
The Outcome
Photo six was selected. Photo six was technically the third-best photo by objective criteria but the best photo in which the person doing the selecting appeared relaxed.
No one remarked on this.
The photo was posted. Everyone was tagged. One person privately looked at it three times to assess how their eyes appeared. Conclusion: acceptable.
The arrangement requires no further maintenance until the next group outing.